Week 49: Thursday – The Importance of the Village in Marriage

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What Does God Expect of Me as a Woman?

Ephesians 5:21-24

Eph 5:21  Submit yourselves to one another because of your reverence for Christ.

Eph 5:22  Wives, submit yourselves to your husband’s as to the Lord.

Eph 5:23  For a husband has authority over his wife just as Christ has authority over the church; and Christ is himself the Savior of the church, his body.

Eph 5:24  And so wives must submit themselves completely to their husbands just as the church submits itself to Christ.

How Should A Wife Should Treat Her Husband?

 1.  THE WIFE SHOULD RESPECT HER HUSBAND

Eph 5:22  Wives, submit yourselves to your husband’s as to the Lord.

Eph 5:24  And so wives must submit themselves completely to their husbands just as the church submits itself to Christ.

A funny story was told about a newlywed couple who drove up to the hotel on their honeymoon. The bride said, “Let’s not act like newlyweds, and let’s act like we’ve been married for a long time.” The husband said, “Okay, you carry the luggage.”

MISUNDERSTANDING of the word submission is the MISCONCEPTION, MISUSE, and MISTREATMENT of the term, creating havoc in a relationship.

The word “submit” comes from a Greek word that means, “to get under” or “yield to authority”.  It is a voluntary submission, not slavery.  It is simply conforming to GOD’S DESIGN TO CREATE ORDER IN MARRIAGE.  A wife is not to be a personal slave but a HELPER and a COMPANION.

2. A WIFE SHOULD PRAISE HER HUSBAND FOR BEING A GOOD LEADER

When a man feels he is the leader, he will stop resenting his wife & fighting her and this will free him to be more considerate of her and of her needs.  He will become more supportive of her & then she will blossom as a person!  Trust him to Lead!

Here are some ways that wives can challenge their husband’s leadership:

1st  BELITTLE HIM, CRITICIZE HIM -this indicates that you don’t believe in him

2nd  DOMINATE YOUR HUSBAND  – especially if your husband is the quiet type

3rd  PUNISH YOUR HUSBAND WHEN YOU DON’T GET YOUR OWN WAY – pouting, giving him the silent treatment or withholding sex

4th   IGNORE WHAT THEY ASK YOU TO DO  – this shows that their words mean nothing

Here are some ways to encourage your husband:

1st  FOLLOW HIS LEADERSHIP they need to be able to lead, and see that you enjoy following him

2nd HAVE CONFIDENCE IN HIM – find ways to build up his self –esteem and let them know that you believe in them. You need to express confidence in their ability and in their decisions.  ADMIRATION IS RESPECT VERBALIZED: “It is wonderful to be married to you!”

3rd  LET YOUR HUSBAND MAKE MAJOR DECISIONS  -You can give advice, but you need to trust him with the final decision

4th GIVE ROOM FOR FREEDOM TO FAIL  -We all make mistakes!  A wife should not hold past mistakes over his head or he’ll be fearful of making future decisions. He needs to know they can fail and still have our respect.

5th  HAVE GOOD COMMUNICATION  -Don’t expect him to know or guess your needs, you need to tell him.

3. ENCOURAGE HIM TO BE A PROVIDER AND A PROTECTOR

When a man comes home, the last thing he needs & wants is pressure from his wife.  What do you think will happen when a husband comes home to find his wife babbling a long list of complaints and things for him to do rather than finding a place to rest and unwind after a hard day’s work?

Wives need to understand the pressure of the husband

1st You Need To Appreciate His Hard Work  – He works hard to show his love.

2nd Encourage His Ambition  -Don’t hold them back, and yet, don’t let them be lazy!

3rd Be Content With What They Make  -Phil. 4:11 “… I have learned, in whatever state …”  Spend money wisely and you will learn how to be content.

4th  Let Him Know You Need Him  –Don’t ever tell him, “I can get along without you!”

5th Enjoy Him at Home, A Place Where He Loves To Be  –Make your home enjoyable for him after work!  The wife should never worry about anything.  The husband should protect physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Show reverence and respect.  Encourage him to be a provider and protector.

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